[blml] Regrets

[Jim Fox]

That's she, not he.

Good points none the less.

Mmbridge

-----Original Message-----
From: blml-bounces at amsterdamned.org [mailto:blml-bounces at amsterdamned.org]
On Behalf Of Robert Frick
Sent: 04/13/2008 12:47 PM
To: Bridge Laws Mailing List
Subject: Re: [blml] Regrets

On Sun, 13 Apr 2008 11:24:51 -0400, Jeff Easterson <JffEstrsn at aol.com>
wrote:

> We have already lost Ed Reppert, and now raija (mustikka). They were 
> two of my favourite blmlers and I always found their comments 
> interesting and often clever/funny.  I think it is most regrettable 
> that we are losing some of our best people but not those whose 
> messages are less amusing and interesting. Is there nothing we can do 
> to stop this?  JE

An important purpose of BLML is to argue/debate/discuss differing
viewpoints. That naturally leads to uncivil behavior, humans being what they
are, unless the people show wisdom and work hard to avoid it. To me, the
members of BLML in general do a GREAT job of this.

raija perhaps did not work at this. He characterized Nigel's point of view
as Nigel advocating the players should lie. I sincerely doubt that (1) Nigel
(or whoever) used the word lying to characterize their own positions, or
that (2) Nigel appreciated that word being used to portray his position, or
that (3) any intelligent discussion was advanced by the use of that term.

raija wrote: "There is an abrasive element on this forum which destroys
civility." If he felt his civility was being destroyed, I believe he is
making a good choice to leave. I would of course prefer that he stay and
practice being civil and ignoring uncivility, but it is his life and his
decision.

As for strategies (is there nothing we can do...), you can try to be civil,
and you can ignore those who are not. If everyone believes someone is
uncivil and ignores that person, then they will leave. But it looks like
BLML is doing as good of job as you can.

Bordering on the uncivil, but it seems useful... Many years ago I joined a
newsgroup dominated by people who thought alike and were not civil to
differing opinions (but they were civil to each other). I expressed a
viewpoint opposed to theirs, and I was civil throughout the battle that
followed while they were not. This battle ended when they all left the
newsgroup to form their own newsgroup. That was not the outcome I was
striving for, but that is what happened
(http://satyagraha1.com/mybattle.htm).

It would probably be natural if I hated raija for his perceived attacks on
me. But we had recently had a pleasant interaction, and I had hoped to
create a friendly relationship. I am sorry that he has left. But, as you may
have guessed, I am unsympathetic if he is trying to portray himself as the
injured nonoffending side.

Bob


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